How To Get A Guy/Girl To Like You

So this fucking post is about how to get a guy or girl to like you.

This is inspired by this insanely amazing guy I am really attracted to. Yeah it sounds stupid but I haven't had a crush on a guy in a long time, and this man is just perfect. I have a pretty good chance with him, but I wanted to be safe so I googled 'how to get a guy to like you' and then immediately after I was like, "wait why the fuck did I even do that".

Let's start from the beginning. When you like a guy or a girl or whatever your preference is, there's this beautiful attraction that blooms. I absolutely love this and I will never admit this if you ever ask me in person because i'm not into sentimental heart flutterings face to face, but I freaking love when you're just beginning to like someone and there are these little bursts of fondness that you find here and there. Like if you guys are talking about Christmas and one of you is like, "Christmas is my favorite holiday", and you're like, "Me too!!!!" and your heart sparks up a little bit because you two have that much more in common. Are you even understanding this? I'm barely getting it either, don't fret.

Well anyways, after this initial attraction from just one of you or both or three or whatever your sexual identity is, you start to wonder if they actually like you. Which is when you start googling absurd things like 'how to get someone to like you'. When I was younger, I was the most shy girl ever and I was scared and worried and anxious and freaked out most of the time. Now I don't really give a fuck. I'll make a post about that later, but I am loving the ever living fuck out of this change.

I used to be the girl who googled 'how to make friends', 'how to get a guy to like you', 'how to get a teacher to like you', 'how to kiss someone' and whatnot. I wanted to know EXACTLY what to do in each situation so I wouldn't seem like such a loser. Because when you're young, it sucks to feel left out. No one likes feeling less than they are, so you try to raise yourself up by learning more about the world so you can become a part of it.

Throughout the years, I became much more confident. This confident radiates from me, and it makes me feel like I'm worth more than what I used to feel like. So when I reverted back to my old way of googling advice, a huge thought occurred and slapped me in the face:
"I ALREADY KNOW THIS ANSWER WHAT THE HELL MAN"

But for old time's sake, I decided to look through the silly Seventeen articles about crushes and whatnot to see if there was any advice I should catch up on. And there was some dumb shit I almost cried about.

Ready for this? Ready? No you aren't.

The advice these people were giving sucked BALLS. I literally read advice that basically said to change yourself in order for them to like you.

Yeah, that's such bullshit.

Here is the real advice:

1. Let the nervousness flow through you. If you truly like someone and you want them to like you as a friend, co-worker, partner, classmate, teacher, student, boyfriend, girlfriend, pet, mailman, what have you, let your anxiety out. Don't become a pent up nervous wreck of yourself. Let yourself laugh, and don't worry about every little thing. You've got to know that this is not the end of the world. If this person doesn't like you, just move on to someone else. There are billions of people in this world, and you are not here to impress every single one.
2. Be positive. Holy motherfucker I can't stress this shit enough. There is NOTHING worse in this world than a negative person. These people weigh me down and suck the happiness and life out of me faster than a dementor feeding off of a fat hobbit after a party. For example, if someone gives you a compliment, TAKE THAT MOTHERFUCKER. Hold that compliment within you until you fucking die. The balls it took for that person to give you that compliment is a compliment enough. They were probably nervous just trying to say that to you. So if they're like, "Wow, I love your curly hair!" Don't you dare fucking say, "Oh I don't really like my hair, it's really annoying." Don't you dare fucking say that or I will come after you. Take that shit to the grave because that is a beautiful thing to say to someone.
3. Don't lie. As much as you really want to say that you go out and party a lot when you honestly don't, just say the truth. Because if someone asks you out and then takes you somewhere where they think you like but you actually don't, it's going to suck. For example, say you told someone that you love to dance and drink and whatnot, so they take you to a really fun, loud bar. BUT, in reality, you would rather stay in your bed and watch Netflix at night. You're not going to be very comfortable in this situation, so just be upfront and honest when it comes to what you like.
4. Tell as many jokes as you can. This might not be for everyone, but it usually works out for most people. Even the dumbest jokes can get you a date or make you laugh. Well it works for me anyways. I am a huge sucker for puns, so I bust them out whenever I can and I laugh at them myself. If you just show that person you're willing to laugh and be easy going, then they're going to like you because you're so comfortable with yourself. This kind of ties in to being positive as well, because laughing is always attractive.
5. Ask the person you like about themselves. People tend to like talking about themselves, so if you ask them nice questions about getting to know them, then they'll warm up to you and open up much more. Just try to keep the conversation going, and don't be afraid to ask deeper questions. Some questions you probably shouldn't ask (What's your favorite sex position?) but some deep questions are more friendly (What did you always want to be as your career when you were a kid?).
5. Show them how good you can cook. Everyone likes food. If you bring someone food that you made, and it tastes delicious, they will love you. I will love you. This guy brought cheesecake the other day to work and I was in love with him for a few days after that, I kid you not. Just make sure you do it in a nice way, not a creepy way. Like make cookies (and you have to make sure they are really really good or else this won't work), and then casually ask if they want a couple of them and then watch their reaction as they eat it. Good luck man

I Am Awesome

I'm so pissed off, I wrote this whole really amazing post about being awesome and I DELETED THE POST BEFORE IT SAVED. But I won't let it get to me because I am too awesome to be mad. If you're in this mindset, nothing will ever get to you.
Do you ever feel stupid, sad, worthless, single, unhelpful, friendless, depressed, or just all around horrible? I definitely have those days when I just want to lay in bed and cry and kill myself. However, no one deserves to feel like that. And if people make you feel like that, get them out of your life. Only you can criticize yourself, and that criticism is only so you can change and be a better version of yourself.

1. So first of all, get some awesome friends who will only bring you up, and never bring you down. At work last week, I was having a really tough day but I won't explain it because it sounds silly now. After I cried in the bathroom, I cleaned myself up and went back to work. I'm pretty sure my coworkers weren't aware that I cried, but when I came back they were miraculously really nice to me and apologized for what they had done earlier. (I work at Starbucks, and it was super crowded and I messed up on a couple of drinks and my coworker was getting angry). I apologized while I was making the drinks, but my coworkers didn't take it as well, until now. So pretty much, don't let other people bring you down because if they're feeling crappy, they want someone to feel crappy with. Don't be that person though. If they're trying to bring you down, tell yourself that you are much better than what they will ever try to make you be.

2. Rock the fuck out. Seriously, just do it. Find some awesome, motivational songs and sing all of the words or drum it all out on your steering wheel until you know you are just flat out awesome. Some songs I would suggest:
Don't Stop Me Now by Queen
Brave by Sara Bareilles

My Way by Frank Sinatra 

This Is Your Life by The Killers

....and of course, Eye of the Tiger by Survivor.

3. Read this right here and do it:

Wake up every morning and tell yourself you're a hardass bitch from hell and that no one can fuck with you and then don't let anybody fuck with you. 

4. Go for an awesome kick butt run, or do some kick boxing or something. Whatever involves kicking or punching or sweating pretty much. You'll look really good afterwards, get a nice workout, and you'll feel 1000% better than how you were before.

5.  Step the fuck away from your normal choice of words such as:
"I don't know."
"I'm not good enough."
"I'm too fat."
"I'm too skinny."
"I'm scared."
"What if they don't like it?"
"What if I look stupid?"
Like seriously, just shut up. Take a stand and think about who you are for a second. Think like this example: I am Stacy, I am 34 years old, I am a stay at home mom, I play piano, and I live in a two story house. Stop after a few descriptions, and then make them more detailed. For example: I am Stacy and I am awesome. I'm only 34 years old, and I have the amazing ability to take care of an entire family, inside of a very spacious two story home. I've been playing the piano since I was 7 years old, and I'm not going to give up now. In fact, I should write some music, or play in some recitals, or even give lessons to people who want to learn. Look at all of the talents and abilities you have and actually use them! Make sure to help people with them as well, or else it will completely go to waste.

6. Watch movies that will distract you from whatever you're going through. However, watch things that are the opposite of what you're going through. If you're thinking that your boyfriend sucks, don't go and freaking watch Kate & Leopold or You've Got Mail or An Affair To Remember. Go and watch XMen or Mission Impossible. By putting your problems aside and focusing on something the complete opposite, the tension that has been eating at you will feel a bit looser. And no, it won't go away completely, but it will ease up a bit. An example of this was when I first started working at Starbucks and I felt so nervous and stupid. I went home and after studying the drink recipe cards, I watched Serendipity because it is so completely cute and irrelevant to my problems. By watching this giant escapade of the search for their soulmates, I was able to distract myself and get in a better mood than how I was feeling before that. Trust me, it's great. And John Cusack is really cute in this movie, and Kate Beckinsale is always beautiful.

7. Get dressed up and look smokin' hot. Do whatever you do to feel sexy, and put yourself out there. Even if you're just going out with your friends, you need to feel as good as possible. Dude even if you don't have any friends, go to the movies my yourself and look HOT. Yes, I admit, I went to the movies last month by myself but I looked fabulous so no regrets whatsoever. It's a great idea okay. So wear a scandalous thong, black sparkly eyeshadow, false eyelashes, short skirt, massive push up bra (yeah you can stuff it if you want to), high heels, tights, no tights, tight pants, a turtleneck, whatever makes you feel as awesome as you possibly can. Just make sure you feel comfortable with what you're wearing, and you like it.

By following these simple rules, you too can be awesome. 

Working Out

Do you even know how awesome working out is? It's like all of your muscles are like, "Dude come on, let's get ready to look good", and your mind is like crying but once you shut your mind off, your body just does it and I think that's an amazing thing that we all can do. I'm 5'10" and 128 pounds, and I love to work out. Running isn't something I favor as much, but I love going to the gym, and doing those sweet workout videos at home where the guy is all "Work that body, own that body!" It's also a bonus that everyone in the workout videos are freaking hot and sexy. Dang.

BUT WHO KNEW you can actually become that sexy person you see in the video! I don't freaking care if you're 350 pounds or 100 pounds, get your lazy butt off of the couch/bed/toilet and go work out. It's not worth it being lazy and unhealthy. And no, I did not say fat. You should always have a positive image of your body. You can actually be very healthy and still be a little on the chunky side, which is cool too. For me, I strive for absolute perfection and the best possible work that I can do. I'm pretty proud to say I'm not chunky or anything, and don't go hating on me for saying that. I've worked for this body, and I'm going to show it off.

After a long hard session of working out, you should feel hot and sexy and toned and amazing. If you don't feel sexy enough, keep working out until your sweat is dripping off of you. There it is, there's the sexiness. Get it. BUT, you need to keep working out. Every single day. Because if you don't, what is the point? You're going to lose all that time, energy, and muscle that you were devoted to improving your body. Keep it up or so help me you will lose all that muscle and gain the fat back. Lol, fat back. Yeah, you're going to get a fat back for real though.

Dude come on though, promise me you're going to work out today. Or if you're reading this at midnight, work out first thing in the morning. Or right now, whatever's comfortable for you. You can always improve on something on your body. If your arms have enough jiggle to create a third arm, then do some dang push ups. If your thighs look like cottage cheese, do some squats.
AND BY THE WAY, do not follow Pinterest's workout plans. They're shit. Just don't. Do you know what i'm talking about? The workout plans in the calendar format, like the crap "Flab Busting February"? The workout is literally like:
Do 1 pushup!!
Do 2 situps!
1 plank for :15 seconds!
Eat fruit today!
Just kill yourself. I love Pinterest workouts (and who doesn't) and some of them are actually very amazing and gratifying, but these lame workouts will do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. And if you're stupid enough to think that your body will change from doing a "flat abs in 2 weeks" workout, then I really don't know what to say to you. You're so much better than that. Find exercises that make you sweat a ton, scream, and tear your legs off because those are the ones that will actually get you in shape. That's a bit graphic I know, but it's the truuuuth. When you're working out, you have to go big or go home. End of story. Repeat that to yourself when you're running, doing situps, benching, whatever. You will never regret it, and you'll look super foxy.

First Post

I made this blog because I wanted to start one, but I didn't know which topic I should make this all about. So basically, it's a broad blog about inspirations. This will range from health, people, beauty, life, careers, money, food, whatever. It's going to be pretty freaking sweet, so just wait for it all to come.
A little bit about me: I'm Justine, I work at Starbucks, I am a student at community college, and I love to write and learn more everyday. I have a lot of free time on my hands since all I do is work and go to school, so I decided to fill my time up with something a bit more productive than Netflix. Although I could stay on Netflix and Tumblr for the rest of my life, I want to do something more substantial than that for the time being. Such as writing a blog. Because that's really substantial.